GENERAL RELIEF.

Simple sinus drank
Tincture of myrrh,
He did not fall down
But his tooth ache was cured.
Then it returned.

He painted his finger
With soft sugared rum,
Applied it all evening
Until he was numb.
Next day it still burned.

He’d heard of the ritual
Of hoku’s delight,
Between thumb and forefinger
He pressed points all night.
But the morning berated.

An abscess appeared
So he called in to see
The man with the pliers
Who prescribed pharmacy.
Until it deflated.

But he didn’t take heed,
And drank through the course,
And seven days later
The swelling was worse.
So he swallowed some more.

This treatment continued
For two further weeks,
Until in his pain
He was unable to speak.
So the dentist implored

Him to go for a general,
And whilst out for the count,
A foreign born butcher
Would whip it straight out.
Our man shook with fear.

But the day had to come,
And sat back in a chair,
A needle was applied,
And the tooth was not there.
And his pain disappeared.

He got out of his seat,
And his legs fell away,
It was better than drugs,
And it lasted all day.
And now every morning he don’t brush his teeth
In the hope of returning to general’s relief.